| Oh You'll never get to heaven (echo)
In a bottle of gin (echo)
Cause the lord don't let (echo)
No spirits in (echo) (repeat without echos)
Oh yer never get to heavan in a bottle of gin
because the Lord wont let no spirts in,
I ain't gonna grieve, my lord no more
I ain't gonna grieve my lord,
I ain't gonna grieve my lord,
I ain't gonna grieve, my lord no more.
(Other Verses) - On roller skates, cause you'll roll right past them pearly gates,
- In a jumbo jet, cause the lord ain't built no run ways yet
- In so and so's bra, cause so and so's bra won't stretch that far
- In a baked bin tin, cause a baked bin tin's got bake beans in
- In a biscuit tin, cause the lord don't let no crummy ones in
- In so and so's car, cause so and so's car won't get that far
- In a portaloo, cause a portaloo is full of water?
- On a Boy Scouts knee, cause a Boy Scout's knee's too knobbly
- Sheet of glass, cause a sheet of glass will cut your bottom?
- On a ping pong ball, cause a ping pong ball is far too small
- On a motor bike, cause half way there you'll have to hike
- In a limousine, cause the lord ain't got no gasoline
- In a rocking chair, cause the lord don't want no rockers there
- In a wicker chair, cause the lord don't want no baskets there
- In a girl guides arms, cause the lord don't want no feminine charms
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